This is not a diet! I repeat - This is not a diet!

I have come to the realization that I don’t like calling what I am doing a diet. The main reason is because this feels more like a new approach to food and being healthy, not just trying to lose weight. Also, there is such a huge stigma attached to dieting, especially so called “fad” diets. I have pretty much been dieting since I was a teenager, even though I have only been overweight four times in my life, with one of those times being right after I had my son.

Over the years I have tried to embrace my curves, using the “I’m just a big-boned German girl” excuse. However, I would be lying if I said I have always been comfortable in my body. No woman is ever completely comfortable in their body… well expect for maybe Angelina Jolie or Heidi Klum. How those women can keep popping out kids and look the way they do right after is beyond me! I swear they are a freak of nature!

But I digress… Although I have been dieting for the last two decades, I have never really learned how to eat healthy or pay attention to what I was actually eating. I’ve watched my calories and tried to limit my carbs, but I never ate enough vegetables or made sure I took my vitamins everyday. Sure I have been able to lose a significant amount of weight numerous times in my life, but it was either by taking some sort of pill or eating Lean Cuisine meals, not drinking soda or cutting back on fast food. This time around I am actually paying attention to what I am putting in my body and have learned a lot from it.

While watching the Biggest Loser the other night, there was a competition where the contestants had to answer questions about the calories, fat, sodium, etc. of various dishes. I was shocked that I actually got every single answer correct! There is no way I could’ve done that 5 weeks ago. My hope is that once I do finally reach my goal weight, I will be able to apply what I have learned to the rest of my life so I will never have to go on a “diet” again!

I'm hungry

I’m hungry! Not starving or undernourished, just hungry! Now I know this should be expected being on a diet and all, but I have read reviews and blogs of other people on this eating plan and they say they are never hungry. I say that is BULL! Yes it is true that because you eat every 2-3 hours on this diet you really aren’t starving, but I’m sorry to say that I believe they are lying if they say they are not hungry at all.

Maybe I am different because my relationship with food is a true love affair. I love to eat. I love the taste of food. I love the feeling of eating a great meal and I love drinking a cocktail or glass of wine with that great meal. My enormous ass is proof of my love of food.

What makes it worse is that I have a child who needs to eat as much fat as possible and a fiancé who has a bottomless stomach and an addiction to Mexican food. I still cook for them and so far I have been able to hang. But yesterday we went to San Francisco, which was where I bathed in crabcakes and cocktails right before I started my diet. Also both boys ordered something with French fries and I had hard time resisting eating any of them.  Now when I say I had a hard time, what I mean to say is I wasn’t able to. That’s right, I cheated and ate a few fries, which wouldn’t have been that bad, if it weren’t for the two glasses of wine I drank them down with.

The worst part about cheating for me is that I was already feeling like I wasn’t losing weight as fast as everyone else on the plan. Most people lose between 20-30 pounds in the first 5 weeks. As of my fourth week I had only lost 13 ½ pounds. Everyone keeps telling me nearly 14 pounds in 4 weeks is great, but I was expecting more. Maybe my ass had other plans!